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Pages: I have decided to become a fucking king bum [1]
Author Topic: I have decided to become a fucking king bum

Posts: 3

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2011-01-30 5-13-30-

I have decided to become a fucking king bum And so as the eagle flies and watches over us as the storm clouds gather and hark! it is to be shouted accross the land... I have decided to become a BUM. What I mean is that I have had zero luck in PORKING a SEXUALY ATTRACTIVE FEMALE for several decades, and so I have decided to live on the streets for a while and find me a homeless FEMALE to PORK. The last BAG LADY I pursued was not suitable as her eyes pointed in opposite directions, confusing me no end and she wouldnt stop beating her head against the wall screaming about the devil - a conversation stopper I felt. So, I was down at Goodwill and got me a FUCKING tasteless pair of brown cordouroy pants ending half way to the knee, a rope belt, a grimy old shirt and ripped string vest, and of courss a smelly old FLASHERS coat. I need to pick a town or city that noone will recognise me in....I was thinking Sacramento, or even down to San Diego...then I'll set off with a piece of old cardboard reading "Vietnam Vet down on my luck" and head off to the freeway exit lights. This way, you see, you see, oh yes you see, I can infiltrate myself into the ranks of the poor and homeless and take advantage of the FEMALES as I of course will have more dollars in my begging cup than my competition - the other tramps! The SEXUALY ATTRACTIVE BAG LADIES will be falling over their shopping carts to get their gnarled dirty old fingers on my unwashed CHEESY COCK just because I'll have a $20 note and fresh Thunderbird to flash about whilst the other Bums are lying arround eating out of dumpsters, drinking turpentine and fighting with themselves. I'll be a FUCKING hero! for the first time in my life! I'll of course shuffle off into a motel when nobody's looking and I need a good nights sleep, but generaly I'll enjoy lying about dead DRUNK and unwashed, playing with my COCK and SHITTING my pants in public. I only need worry about the cops moving me on. If I have no ID and mutter religous SHIT everytime the come near me whilst beating myself about the head with my FISTS I'm sure they'll just leave me al
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Posts: 6

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2011-01-31 7-03-06-

cuntinued Just think - SpasticSid - me - hero of the BUM world. They'll carry me shoulder high and it'll just cost me a couple hundred bucks to flash about... I'm infact very excited about the whole thing. I though it up whilst DRUNK last night and wrote the idea down. I'm planning it like a vacation. I'll let you know how it let me know if you have any advice or web sites on how to live on the streets. Probably I will become a BUM next week if the weather holds out...
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Posts: 5

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2011-01-31 23-04-24

Why not get a tent and live in the woods There's food there. Maybe you can squat out a few acres and do some light farming, fishing and hunting. Try to get work here and there to buy bullets, fishing line, other consumables you can't make yourself. I've seriously considered doing something like this. I figure it has more dignity than actually begging.
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Posts: 2

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2011-02-02 13-23-59

I'm only in it for the... lying arround drunk, soiling myself and fucking bag ladies.
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  • garibay

    Posts: 14

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    2011-02-02 19-29-53

    hey did you get my email?
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  • daebum

    Posts: 15

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    2011-02-03 9-24-41-

    no..should I have?
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  • achey

    Posts: 17

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    2011-02-03 9-51-33-

    yeah. hmmm maybe ill try to resend it
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