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Pages: Crumbling Marriage [1]
Author Topic: Crumbling Marriage
haldeman

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2011-01-30 1-36-29-

Crumbling Marriage First of let me say please do not insult my wife here. My wife cheated on me 1 yr ago and 1 week ago she asked me to leave our home so she could find herself. I think she is seeing a mutual male friend who we had live with us a month ago because he is always over there now that i do not live there. She says there is nothing going on but lies to me that he is there. She says I do not trust her but her choices dont allow me to. Am I overbering or should i be concerned and how do I save my marriage.
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bundschuh

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Posts: 14

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2011-01-31 7-26-33-

what's your point Are you looking for someone to carry you around before you can make a decision for yourself?
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lindstrand

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Posts: 5

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2011-01-31 8-08-53-

Save your marriage? You gotta be joking?
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  • euclid

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    Posts: 3

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    2011-01-31 9-56-30-

    why don't you ask her if she wants to divorce or if she even wants to save the marriage with you. it takes 2 to tango i thought. you can't save everything yourself.
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    offutt

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    Posts: 6

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    2011-02-02 18-41-07

    maybe you're on an episode of Punk'd
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    Marcile

    Member
    Posts: 40

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    2011-02-03 8-01-21-

    You shouldn't have moved out. It's your house 2
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  • eagleson

    Sexy
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    2011-02-03 15-27-40

    ^^ This
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    elenbaas

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    Posts: 6

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    2011-02-06 19-32-02

    You know those crazy ass people who just never get the point? You know, those stalkers of celebrities who are all "He is gonna LEAVE that skanky whore millionaire actress with a perfect body for my trailer park ass!" Congrats, you are the trailer park ass. Dude, your first mistake was leaving. She wants to find herself? Let her ass leave the comfort of the home, not you. She already has your replacement there and she is getting banged like a screen door in a F5 hurricane. If she wanted to find herself, why did she not go all walkabout like an aboriginal? Nooooo she gave you walking papers. And you actually left. You are a dumbass. Admit it. Just tell her if she wanted to work on things she would not be pulling this shit. Show up, take your shit, remove yourself from the accounts, (drain them first, imho) and then slap your papers for divorce down. You can't save what she doesn't want.
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  • sanmartin

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    2011-02-17 3-00-15-

    You've made mistakes? What were they?
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  • dubin

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    2011-03-23 14-14-22

    Good questrion. Bet your bottom dollar . . . that his wife's list of his mistakes would be far different from his own.
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  • hiett

    Sexy
    Posts: 20

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    2011-04-11 12-40-14

    If she's not interested, there is no hope. You can't make the marriage work all by yourself, no matter how hard you try or what romantic gestures you exhibit.
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    kelman

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    Posts: 25

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    2011-09-14 21-17-29

    If she doesn't want things to be happy again then there really isn't an option for that I'm sorry to say. Both people have to want it and from what you've written about her actions, it doesn't seem like she does. I think you should see a marriage counselor. And I don't necessarily mean with her. a marriage counselor can help you to understand why things failed and when things are really over or if they actually do have a chance to resurect.
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    birkeland

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    2012-02-13 21-57-24

    be careful with the marriage counselor My stbx wife and I went to for a few years, were with the same during the break up and mine kept telling me she couldn't believe she left, that everything seemed like it was going great (she even reduced the sessions a week earlier and wife was saying everything was fine blah blah blah). She also kept telling me she would come back and in the state I was in which was much like the OP it made me hold on even longer. I am not saying not to seek it out just make sure it is a good fit and they aren't just telling you what you want to hear.
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    oyola

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    Posts: 20

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    2012-05-09 6-38-58-

    Why not insult her? She's theexiting the marriage. Why do you have to leave? Your wife, I'm afraid, is a selfish cunt.
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    Cynde

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    Posts: 50

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    2013-03-01 8-20-32-

    Don't leave your home Have seperation papers drawn up, and signed so that she can go find herself outside of the home, while you aren't put out, and then find out when you can legally change the locks.
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    Uunko

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    Posts: 27

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    2013-12-27 15-45-32

    Move back into your home today I was and partially still in your shoes x months ago. I was asked to move out. She wanted to end our marriage. I left forday. Came back and stood my ground. Told her I love you and I dont want this to end but if you want out of our marriage there is the door. I am going no where. Guess what? She moved out the next day. I understand your pain and dont take everyone telling what they are as being mean. they are trying to get you to open your eyes. You want her back? You have to realize a few things..... x. It may not happen x. You have to stand your ground and not show her weakness x. State how you feel and leave it at that x. No begging, pleading or crying x. You have to be willing to wait it out x. You chances are slim I am not going to bore everyone here with my story...they heard it many times. I got much the same advice as you and I didnt listen and she never came back. You have to let her see what life is without you. x. Move back in the home x. File for legal separation x. Close all joint bank accts (be fair and dont try to screw her this is about protecting yourself and nothing more) The only piece I followed was going back home and its about the only piece of self respect I had in the situation Try to keep your emotions in check man. Throw yourself into your work, start some new or pick up old hobbies. If you sit around and do nothing for yourself you risk depression. Keep busy. Good luck and if you would like to talk you can email me by clicking on my handle
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  • files

    Sexy
    Posts: 18

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    2014-01-29 9-43-20-

    don't insult your wife? alright, but then I'll have to insult YOU ... for being a doormat. Your wife cheats on you, lies to you, asks you to leave your home (and you do it) and shows no sign of actually WANTING to work on your 'marriage.' My advice: move back into your home, file for divorce and work on your self-esteem.
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  • garibay

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    Posts: 41

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    2014-03-22 17-05-40

    You are funny First off, your wife is done with you. You can't save it if she doesn't want to. It takesto tango but onlyto end the dance. Asking what you can do to fix it is stupid, she banged some other dude a year ago, then kicked you out of your own house so she could bang some other dude... at LEAST x. If you don't think he is sleeping in your bed and doing your wife then you are delusional. Move back into your house, tell her if she wants out to pack her shit and get the fuck out, grow a pair of balls, and stop being a whipping boy. Right now your her cuck. Begging and pleading for her to give you some attention, but all of her attention is being sprinkled on some other dude.
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