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Pages: Bit lost... [1]
Author Topic: Bit lost...
al-farran

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2011-01-30 15-18-12

Bit lost... Okay, here goes. *gulp* After thirty-some years of trying to convince myself otherwise, I've finally admitted to myself I'm bi. I've come out to a few close friends... but NOT my husband. Does anyone here have any advice for me? I'm so lost right now... it feels like my world is falling apart, and it is - at least, my picture of what my world WAS is...
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zared

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2011-02-01 5-37-07-

only you will know how your husband would feel. And it's thing accepting that you're bi and another wanting to explore your bi side from within a marriage. Well done for being able to understand and accept that you're not the person you thought you were
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miraglia

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2011-02-02 21-19-24

Do you have a crush on your boss? I'm just curious if a sudden attraction has unleashed all these feelings in you.
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Oleesa

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2011-02-03 0-55-37-

This is a hard thing for us to answer for you as much as we may empathize - many of us came out late(r) in life. Not that you are necessarily doing that - just to let you know a lot of gay women took a journey in figuring out their sexuality. You're married - that's a big deal right there. Even bigger if you have ren. And there are so many variables in sexuality and how it manifests itself that a bunch of strangers on the internet, no matter how well-meaning, can't really help you sort out your life, marriage and attractions. I know this is of our standards, but how about therapy? A good therapist or counselor can help you sort out how you're feeling and what it all means. Good luck.
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swailes

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2011-02-04 4-12-11-

You know . . . there are an awful lot of people who are bi and monogamous. You can be aware of your own attractions and feelings, without having to act on them, just as you would if you were attracted to someone of the opposite sex. If you're happy otherwise, maybe talk to a good therapist.
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  • provencio

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    2011-02-18 8-02-57-

    see now that's the part that to me seems common sense. Yeah, so you're attracted to women, so what? You're attracted to many people of whatever gender, that doesn't mean you go boinkin' everyone willy nilly when you've committed to being with "til death do us part".
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    lutey

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    2011-04-11 12-40-20

    while you make some excellent points and I apologize ahead of time, this not being my opinion, but SOME men feel like it is not cheating if their wives have affairs with women, since after all, women cannot possibly present any sort of a real threat, right? This self-involved arrogance keeps the therapists in business since these (ex)husbands don't do well when their *just out to be cool* bisexual wives discover multiple orgasms and get a Uhaul. However, you wouldn't argue that it is cheating if it is taking place with full knowledge of all the sides involved? Wouldn't that fall in the polyamory department? It sounds to me that you were hurt by a cheater, and I am very sorry that you had to go through that.
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  • messerli

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    2011-09-15 10-23-11

    You really just don't get it.
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  • daniele

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    2011-10-25 9-57-02-

    which part the way *some* men see their wives' affairs with women? That is their opinion, not mine. or the fact that some women have both BFs and GFs or, more than GF at the same time is polyamory, not cheating (if everyone knows)? (while I understand most women want to have a monogamous relationship for life or as long as possible) please point out which is incorrect since I want to learn. I appreciate you post rather than just neg since I really want to understand what you mean.
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    kite

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    2011-11-17 21-07-46

    for starters........... -the part where you try to get a lesbian to understand a straight male point of view -the part where you continually spew about having a husband and a GF -the part where you assume GrnEggsHam must have been hurt by a cheater to hold her point of view
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    schalk

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    2012-08-01 3-43-18-

    misthread........ should be under your "which part" response. apologies.
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    benninger

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    2013-01-24 2-51-57-

    sorry didn't mean to offend do I really bring up the husband that much at this forum? seems like I mostly bring him up on poly or bi forum. I will try not to bring him up. Oh I realize I do bring him up when I sent women to the married lesbian board well perhaps they go there and never come back, no? everyone agrees cheating is bad, it seemed extra personal to Grn, sorry to jump to conclusions.
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    ewton

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    2013-11-01 21-29-08

    I appreciate her forthrightness about her polyamorous relationship. She is the B in GLBT, eh?
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    eskridge

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    2014-01-26 13-39-39

    I admit I don't read her posts terribly carefully, but I don't neg her on sight either. Clearly, Unconsciousness is not a lesbian, also not monogamous. But also not a cheater. Multiple times, multiple posters have complained about polyamorous or swinger couples who treat their third or other partners as a human sex toy. Is that the focus of scorn? Cause there is some scorning going on. How about it, unconsciousness? If your sweetheart needs a root canal do you show up with milkshakes, hold her hand under anesthesia, and prop her up on the couch with pillows? Or do you treat her like a human convenience item? How about it, CBeaver/neg raters? Are you pro-monogamy activists, is she getting flamed for multiple partners, or is she offensive in some other way?
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  • helvey

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    2014-05-17 23-08-39

    I didn't neg in this thread either and I fordon't have a problem with our bisexual gals. And heck, I heart you, Bean. I get tired of hearing from the "I wanna play with a gurl" and/or the "hubby will/won't be involved" crowd - and I don't reckon I'm keen to hear about someone's het marriage or boyfriend issues, tis true - but I'm not going to tack up the rainbow rope on our bi sisters. Heck, I got negged for my Paul Bunyan post, so who knows - a certain amount of the red seems to be random. But when it goes over x or so, it does seem significant.
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    wissinger

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    2015-07-23 13-21-38

    Well... Paul Bunyon is a man, doncha know. Maybe Babe wouldn't have been negged?
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  • tietz

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    2015-08-07 1-06-16-

    Oops, Babe was negged. Poop.
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  • kocsis

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    2016-01-05 9-06-49-

    That Babe was such a tart.
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